My baby girl lit up when I noticed all of the thought and care she put into the anniversary card she made for us.  See how she split the heart in half?  See how she has one side with a banana tree and a coconut tree with coconuts on the ground, and “Trinidad” written vertically? Then on the other side she has… well… footballs. Cause that’s what daddy likes.  I was so proud of her… I gushed – she glowed. I pointed out each thing that I noticed about the card, and let her know how much I appreciated her effort.

It doesn’t matter how old I get, how many achievements I have, it still does something inside of me to have my mother and father say, “well done.”  I don’t know what it is about that feeling.

I don’t even know how to describe it.  It is a mixture of joy, surprise, relief, and elation – all blended together like a milkshake – going down easy, cool and perfect, with no brain freeze.

“Good job.” Just two words, but they can change a person’s day, their week… and sometimes, their life.  When I started blogging about Caribbean parenting, I started to look around for other bloggers like me, and there was just one, who had long since given up after just three or four posts. Other than that, there were none, so I moved on to Caribbean bloggers in general.  Many of the blogs I found were abandoned by their owners, no longer receiving the time and attention that they once did.  I would go to the archives and read their work, some of it quite good.

For years they posted, some diligently and consistently reporting on the issues in the Caribbean, travel, food, culture, and business, and in return they got silence.  No comments, no likes, no tweets and retweets, no buzz.  Just all quiet – like the sound of your house when the power goes out.  Not turned off leaving a hum of hope, just out – no juice at all – no hope of a spark.

As I read, and read, I just wished that I had found them before they jumped ship.  I wished I had found them just in time to say, “good job.”

My parents had two different ways of rewarding a job well done.  My mom, she would pay.  If I got good grades, I got money.  If I earned a medal of some sort, we had Chinese food from my favorite restaurant.  My dad, he would just tell me, “that is beautiful, I’m going to hang that up in my office.” Then he would put it up, and show me where he put it.  Even today, my work from third grade is hanging up in his house – framed.  In a lot of homes, not just Caribbean ones, there’s just not enough, “good job” getting thrown around.  I’m not saying for simple tasks that must be done as a part of being in a household, like washing the dishes or cleaning their rooms.  I am speaking of their artwork, their writing, the stories they beg to tell you.  There’s something about the validation that a child gets for sharing their creative gifts, their talents, that thing that no one can do exactly like they do it, that feels amazing.

We wonder where the creativity has gone in adults.  Some of us show what we can do, and don’t get paid.  Others of us submit our best creative work for approval, and are met with rejection. In other cases, that creativity saving “good job” just never came.  After years and years, from childhood to adulthood, of work gone unloved, drawings unnoticed, and stories unappreciated, creativity was abandoned.  There were no comments, no likes, no buzz – then the lights went out.

I encourage you to take a moment to tell someone “good job” today.  As a matter of fact, pick one person – the cashier at the grocery store, they guy folding the shirts at your favorite department store, the waitress who takes your order, the artist who painted your child’s cheek at the mall, or the blogger who is on the edge of giving up, to give them the “good job” that they need to keep that light on – however dim it may have become.

Tell your kids EVERY day, that they have done well at something. Pick anything that they have truly excelled in.  You’ll find you won’t have to look very far.

If no one has told you today, I’m telling you – “you’ve done a good job.” Stick with it.  Your creativity and willingness to share it means a lot to those around you, whether they say so or not. Don’t give up on your creative talents – someone is listening.