When I decided to cut my hair, my daughter asked me why. I wasn’t sure what to tell her.  I knew that I had a ton of reasons, but one of them was that I was just tired of going through so much every six weeks.  Why on earth was I doing it anyway?  I really didn’t have a reason that didn’t sound like I had a problem with the hair that God gave me.

So if I couldn’t give baby girl a reasonable explanation as to why I was straightening my hair, could I come up with a reason why I shouldn’t? Yep, I could.

So that settled it.

For some reason, I always loved seeing my mom with a small natural afro. She can’t understand why – and honestly, neither can I, but that is just what always made me happy when I looked at her.  She looked so sophisticated and confident.

Growing up, I’d come in to show off my new hairstyle to my dad, and without fail – every time – he would say, “Why don’t you just get a short little afro? I always liked that.”  Um, Dad – maybe because I was like 6 months old… could be that.  My dad saw my little afro for the first time at my brother’s rehearsal dinner.  I don’t think I have ever seen him so happy with my hair.

When baby girl asked me when I was going to get my straight hair back, I told her, “Never.” I meant it.  I told her that I wanted to have curly hair like hers again, and the only way for me to get it was to cut off the relaxed hair.  Her face lit up. “Like MINE?”

“Yes,” I told her, “like yours.”  So there it is.  I’ll be encouraging her to make her own hair decisions, like her Auntie Toy.  I want her to be happy with what God gave her, but understand that it is her decision to change it to fit her life and how she feels. I want her to know that natural hair is an option for her.  I think seeing my mom change her look from natural, to relaxed, to wigs, to braids, and back again let me know that it was okay to do something different.  Did I do different things with my hair often? Not nearly as often as she did, but now at thirty blah-blah years old, I am trying something that is totally new… just letting it be.

I am one year into natural hair. Some people call it their nappy-versary.  I call it my natural-versary! For me that means, no relaxer, no texturizer, no hot combs, no blow dryers, no color.  I am definitely enjoying every day – I better do this with a smile on my face or just not do it at all.  After all, baby girl is watching.